[Some words in this here post are NSFW]

Blog posts titled “Why Romance Novels Are So Popular” always say things like this:

Romance novels unlike other types offer you a chance to fall in love with the characters while they fall in love with each other. Despite whatever events occur during the novel, you the reader, know that in the end there will be a happy ending. And everyone loves a happy ending. Didn’t all of our favorite Fairy Tales end with “And They Lived Happily Ever After”. I also believe that romance novels are so spectacular and popular because there are so many types of romance novels available. Readers can find everything from sweeping historical novels, to sweet contemporaries and paranormals to steamy eroticas.

And that’s fine and good and TRUE, even.

But it would be SO refreshing and endlessly funny to click on one of these posts and it just pop up with a series of quotes like these:

From Elle Kennedy’s As Hot As It Gets:

“Why, Mia, I am a gentleman.” He peered up at her with an evil grin. “But I’m also a dirty motherfucker who wants you to rub your cunt all over his face. Got a problem with that?”

From Jaci Burton’s Melting The Ice:

“Take your bikini bottoms off and let me lick your pussy.” Shuddering at the prospect, she stood and untied the strings at her hips, then pulled away the material and tossed it to the side. “Now come sit on my chest and let me suck your clit. I want you to scream for me.”

from Rachel Gibson’s True Love And Other Disasters:

“Put your feet on my shoulders.” Then he parted her thighs and took her into his hot mouth. He didn’t show her any more gentleness now than he had to her breasts a moment ago. He ate her like she was strictly there for his pleasure alone. He ravished her with his mouth and tongue, and God help her if she didn’t love that too.

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